buy viagra lowest price cheap generic viagra order cialis in us order cheap viagra online cheap cialis in canada buy discount cialis viagra price find cheap viagra online generic viagra low cost viagra buy sildenafil in canada erectile dysfunction buying generic viagra cheap cialis from canada cialis 10mg buy viagra online buy sildenafil cheap buy cheapest cialis cialis rx order viagra no prescription buying viagra buying cialis online buy viagra from india cialis cheapest price order cialis cheap online order no rx cialis cialis 10 mg overnight viagra tablet viagra buy generic cialis online cialis bangkok buy generic viagra viagra canada find viagra online buy and purchase sildenafil online cheap generic cialis viagra rx no prescription cialis find cialis 50 mg viagra viagra vs cialis buy sildenafil online order cialis without prescription cheap viagra online cialis information viagra cost 100 mg viagra purchase viagra viagra viagra from canada buy viagra internet drug viagra online purchase order cialis no rx discount cialis discount viagra discount viagra without prescription viagra without rx certified viagra find discount viagra cialis no online prescription cost of viagra find cialis without prescription buy discount viagra online buy cheap cialis lowest price cialis viagra pharmacy online viagra cheap sale viagra order viagra online cheap cialis tablet order cialis overnight delivery buy cialis low price cheap viagra without prescription cheapest cialis price viagra online without prescription buy sildenafil low cost compare viagra prices online buy cialis on line buy cialis generic impotence viagra tablets buy viagra generic cialis buy viagra low price viagra purchase best price for viagra 25mg viagra buy cialis from india cialis drug order viagra on internet low cost cialis buy discount viagra impotence treatment viagra pill order viagra from us buy sildenafil in uk overnight cialis cialis soft tab viagra medication cialis cheap impotence pills discount cialis online cheapest cialis online order cialis from canada cialis no prescription viagra cheap drug cheap viagra tablets buy viagra without prescription viagra online pharmacy viagra approved find cheap cialis cost cialis buy viagra on line cialis 20 mg buy cialis cheap cheapest viagra free cialis buy cheap cialis online pharmacy cialis cialis without rx cialis overnight shipping compare cialis prices online cheap cialis overnight delivery cialis tablets 20 mg cialis order viagra from canada cheap viagra from usa buy cheap viagra internet cheapest cialis 10 mg cialis purchase cialis buy sildenafil citrate cheap cialis no prescription order generic viagra cialis online cheap cheap cialis on internet drug cialis buy sildenafil internet cialis from india no rx cialis viagra cheapest price where to buy cialis order cialis in canada cialis medication cialis pharmacy discount cialis no rx cialis no rx required viagra overnight shipping cialis sales buy cialis from canada cialis prescription cheap viagra in uk purchase cialis overnight delivery cialis price where to buy viagra viagra no rx required cheap viagra overnight delivery viagra india buying generic cialis cialis malaysia cialis pill cialis for order cialis soft order viagra in canada generic viagra online cialis for sale impotence medication online viagra viagra soft viagra pharmacy purchase viagra overnight delivery buy cialis on internet cialis canada order discount cialis online buy viagra overnight delivery cheapest viagra price buy cialis from us cheap cialis from usa generic cialis cheap viagra no rx lowest price for cialis buy sildenafil online without a prescription viagra vendors cost of cialis generic viagra cheap cialis free delivery viagra in malaysia viagra uk find cialis online order viagra without prescription find discount viagra online cheap cialis from uk drug viagra cialis in uk cialis without a prescription viagra in australia find no rx cialis drug cialis online purchase cialis free sample buy cialis internet viagra generic find cheap viagra cheapest generic cialis online find cheap cialis online compare cialis prices order viagra no prescription required viagra us cheap viagra in usa find discount cialis purchase cialis no rx no prescription viagra cialis online viagra no online prescription fda approved cialis cheap cialis pharmacy buy viagra no prescription required cialis side effects viagra in uk viagra no prescription viagra in us cialis pharmacy online find viagra cheapest generic cialis cost viagra buy viagra cheap buy cialis in canada buy cialis no prescription required buy cialis us order cialis from us 100mg viagra free viagra find discount cialis online cheap viagra cialis buy online cialis overnight buy sildenafil canada cialis 20mg cheapest cialis prices viagra without prescription order cheap viagra cheap price viagra buy no rx viagra purchase viagra no rx pharmacy viagra find viagra no prescription required cheapest generic viagra cialis in malaysia cialis purchase buy cialis lowest price order no rx viagra cheapest generic viagra online order viagra cheap cialis where to order viagra fda approved viagra buy no rx cialis purchase viagra without prescription cheap cialis no rx cialis online stores cheap cialis in uk find cialis on internet certified cialis price of viagra purchase cialis online cheapest viagra prices find viagra on internet buy cheapest cialis online buy discount cialis online buy viagra from us buy cheapest cialis on line cialis cheap drug buy cialis online cheap find cialis no prescription required cialis us cheap viagra pill viagra free sample cheap viagra tablet viagra online cheap cheap cialis in usa cheap cialis without prescription order viagra no rx order viagra cheap online viagra prescription discount cialis overnight delivery cialis australia buy viagra on internet cialis buy drug order viagra in us cialis vendors cialis tablet viagra drug viagra tablet cialis cost cheap cialis tablets cialis discount buy cialis in us online pharmacy cialis sale cialis cheap viagra on internet buy viagra in us discount viagra overnight delivery 25 mg viagra cheap price cialis buy cheapest viagra cheap viagra no rx viagra online stores order generic cialis viagra online review best price viagra cialis overnight delivery cialis pills cialis online review buy cialis overnight delivery order viagra overnight delivery buy viagra no rx cheapest sildenafil citrate viagra free delivery viagra sale 50mg viagra buy cialis without prescription cialis prices tablet cialis find viagra without prescription viagra order buy cheap viagra online viagra pills cialis in bangkok cialis without prescription order discount viagra buy viagra in canada viagra bangkok lowest price for viagra pharmacy online cheap cialis online viagra for sale cialis cheap price discount viagra online impotence cure cheap cialis internet approved viagra pharmacy cialis approved cheap viagra from canada 10mg cialis viagra prices cialis in us compare viagra prices cialis vs viagra viagra internet cheapest viagra online buy cheapest viagra online online cialis viagra side effects generic cialis online buy cheap viagra order cheap cialis online viagra online viagra malaysia buy cheapest viagra on line order cialis no prescription required cialis buy approved cialis pharmacy viagra in bangkok cheap viagra pharmacy order cialis no prescription lowest price viagra cialis sale order cialis online order cialis on internet order discount viagra online best price cialis cialis no rx viagra buy online online pharmacy viagra cheap cialis pill cheap viagra in canada cialis online without prescription cheap viagra from uk cheap viagra internet find no rx viagra buy sildenafil in spain order cheap cialis order discount cialis impotence drugs buy cialis no rx purchase cialis without prescription viagra overnight delivery viagra discount no rx viagra buy generic cialis viagra without a prescription buy viagra us discount viagra no rx viagra soft tab viagra cheap price cialis order purchase viagra online cialis generic viagra information discount cialis without prescription viagra buy drug buy cheap cialis internet cialis internet 20mg cialis buy viagra cialis in australia viagra australia viagra buy generic drugs viagra from india buy viagra online cheap buy cialis cialis from canada pfizer viagra price of cialis cialis uk viagra overnight buy generic viagra online buying viagra online buy cialis online viagra for order cheap viagra no prescription viagra sales generic cialis buy viagra from canada best price for cialis order cialis cialis online pharmacy buying cialis where to order cialis cialis india
been a relatively boring day. nothing TOO special going on. spent most of it cleaning up my D: drive, burning and backing things up considering my /anime directory was 100gb on a 200gb drive. i’m really fucking anal about keeping free space. there’s no reason to be, but i love having the space to do whatever the fuck i want. it’s pretty funny. D: is only anime, movies, porn, mp3’s and the like. C: is windows and installed programs. porn and pirating > actually working on my computer.
i burned through 7 dvd-r’s and 1 dvd-r DL burning all that crap. yee-haw. but. that’s what they’re there for. and i have an assload more to burn on.
aside from that, i put up a post on shacknews selling a bunch of stuff i don’t need or play anymore. it all went pretty quick, shackers are consumer whores. not that i’m complaining. they got good deals, i made some dough. 175 bucks, actually. all ‘cos i wanted.. this!
the logitech g15 gamer’s keyboard. it may seem retarded to you but you gotta understand that new technology is like crack to me. plus it has programmable keys. makes things in windows easier, games, media.. so on and so forth. that and i think i just wanted to be able to buy something for myself. it’s been a while since i’ve been pretty tight on money. i did get it for 65 shipped though, thanks to a friend, so it wasn’t too bad.
anyhow. that’s it, and that’s all.
one of my friends died friday.
it’s pretty goddamn sobering when someone you talked to not weeks ago is, well, gone. i still have messages from him in my inbox. i have him on my ICQ list. offline. offline. offline.
offline. and never on again.
i have pictures of us playing in world of warcraft. he played elania.
i was in the shower today and i thought about how hard this is hitting me compared to my grandparents or my great aunt. it felt wrong.
i thought about my announcement of his death to the shack. i wondered if part of me was using it as publicity. as excitement that i got to tell them. i had to convince myself that i’m not that shallow. i’m not that bad of a person. my mind wandered and ended up at a bad theoretical standpoint. even though it wasn’t true, i had to tell myself i told them so they’d know.
i think i’m hurting myself for not being able to talk to him beforehand. maybe i’m overdramatizing. am i making this out to be more than it is? it was strangely like having a significant other. i’d login to wow and go questing or just generally mess around with him every. single. day. for five months. even after i quit, we still talked via shackmsg, or ICQ. i’ve lost my ICQ logs.
i paused for a minute there and found them in my backup. i have them.
the last time i talked to him was november.
i said “YOU ARE DEAD TO ME.”
i meant it as a joke. he had resubscribed to world of warcraft. but looking back on it now it’s like.. god, that’s fitting.
hindsight is 20/20.
—–
Session Start (904876:foo the feeble): Sat Sep 24 23:29:20 2005
[23:29] foo the feeble: pain. agony.
[23:29] draconic: are you watching solaris on AMC too?
[23:29] foo the feeble: that would be one of the few things to make it worse
[23:32] foo the feeble: it won’t be on until after Clear and Present Danger it seems
[23:32] draconic: what’s wrong then?
[23:33] foo the feeble: well, it started by me waking up with a dreadful headache on Thursday, which is why I wasn’t around. Then yesterday I had doctor appointments, which is now why I have a whole body that hurts. Ha.
[23:34] draconic: so did they say what’s wrong with you?
[23:34] foo the feeble: nothing. I don’t normally get around though.
[23:35] draconic: get around?
[23:36] foo the feeble: yep, get around, normally bedridden :)
[23:36] draconic: are you serious?
[23:36] foo the feeble: yep
[23:36] draconic: i thought foo the feeble was just ‘cos you were a nerd like everyone else.
[23:37] foo the feeble: well, that too
[23:37] draconic: why? what’s the dilly yo?
[23:39] foo the feeble: became a paraplegic in 1999, which quickly gave me problems with pressure sores, so I ended up having to stay in bed a lot to heal, which made it increasingly difficult to do anything.
[23:39] draconic: jesus how? can i ask? we don’t have to talk about it if not.
[23:41] foo the feeble: oh, I have Marfan’s Syndrome. One of the effects of which is weak blood vessels, so I had a dissecting aneurysm. For whatever reason, the surgery to repair it caused a blood clot to get into one of my blood vessels somewhere, so it cut off blood supply to my spinal cord.
[23:42] draconic: wow. that’s.. a big ol’ slap in the nuts. “hi there, we’re gonna be fixing some stuff.. whoops..”
[23:42] foo the feeble: yeah, that was not an outcome I expected
[23:42] draconic: did they even foresee it?
[23:42] foo the feeble: probably, seems it’s a somewhat common complication
[23:43] draconic: so.. it’s from the waist down?
[23:43] foo the feeble: although I heard another doctor on TV saying that they could repair these things with some 90% chance of you walking out of the hospital ha.
[23:43] foo the feeble: starts just below my diaphragm
[23:43] draconic: can you sense a defined line of where?
[23:44] draconic: or is it lower in some places.. higher in others, etc.
[23:44] draconic: if i’m asking too many questions, tell me to shut up, by the way.
[23:44] foo the feeble: well it starts there, things feel funny, then it gets to about my waist where there is nothing.
[23:45] foo the feeble: no big deal, this is outside the realm of common experience anyway.
[23:45] draconic: i’ve never known a paraplegic, personally. so i have a fuckton of questions but i’ll shut my yap.
[23:47] foo the feeble: no big deal. Heck, most people in hospitals haven’t.
[23:48] draconic: i take it back, solaris is kind of like a movie i’d like. i think i remember hating the ending though.
[23:49] foo the feeble: I had it going in the background and paid nearly no attention to it.
[23:49] draconic: i’m big on strange stories.
[23:49] foo the feeble: how strange is it?
[23:51] draconic: it’s a remake of an old 50’s movie, if i remember the timeperiod right, and in this version, george clooney flies up to a space station that’s observing some sort of nebula named Solaris - and strange things are happening on the station, like people seeing loved ones that have died long ago, clooney is a psychologist, i think? to evaluate the crew, and doesn’t believe any of them until his wife starts appearing.
[23:52] foo the feeble: whee :)
[23:52] draconic: sorry, 20 years off. 1972 was the original
[23:53] draconic: kay one last question. were you bedridden before you were a paraplegic?
[23:54] foo the feeble: no, heh
[23:54] draconic: fuckin a.. can you get around though? wheelchair and all that?
[23:54] foo the feeble: yeah, it’s possible.
[23:54] draconic: but?
[23:55] foo the feeble: no real reason to, plus by and large I stay out of my wheelchair to avoid pressure sores.
[23:56] draconic: wouldn’t moving around, albeit in a wheelchair, still help with the sores or are the sores from something other than being bedridden?
[23:56] foo the feeble: the sores are from sitting in the chair
[23:56] draconic: guh.
[23:57] draconic: they’re not really bad though, are they?
[23:57] draconic: wikipedia is fucking with my head listing all the bad shit with everything i look up.
[23:58] foo the feeble: pretty bad actually, take forever to heal
[23:59] draconic: dammit. :( i’m sorry.
[23:59] foo the feeble: oh well :)
[00:00] draconic: says here people with marfan’s have long limbs. gotcha some seven foot arms, do ya? :D
[00:01] foo the feeble: heh. My arm span is pretty long.
[00:01] foo the feeble: not 7 feet though heh
[00:03] draconic: well. heal up, get better, get moving, so on and so forth. easier said than done, but. heh.
[00:04] foo the feeble: yeah, heh. The wikipedia article on dissecting aortic aneurysm is very good by the way.
[00:06] draconic: I BET I COULD DO IT NOW!
[00:06] draconic: pff doctor’s license indeed.
[00:06] foo the feeble: heh
[00:12] draconic: nuts, gotta clean up a bit. be back in a while
[00:12] foo the feeble: okie
Session Close (foo the feeble): Sun Sep 25 00:12:45 2005
—–
he was 31.
so, this past week has been.. interesting.
first of all, drac.org was taken out by shackers who raped my bandwidth (1and1’s free 3 year thing gave me 5gb to play with - i’d have to resize my images, limit access to certain things, couldn’t do much with it) looking at my /wtf directory of funny and retarded images. they went 40gb over the limit, and i owed 20 bucks for overages. kind of a bitch.
so, i’ve remedied that problem by taking 1and1 up on their offer of a pretty bitchin’ package of 30gb storage, 1.5tb bandwidth, 5 domain names, all for 9.99 a month. the price is good for three years, so i couldn’t really pass it up. now i can do whatever the fuck i want! HAW.
aside from my domain and hosting woes, nothing big has happened. i can run down a list for you:
- a wonderful guy came into my life who i’m glad to have as a friend
- webcam striptease for a lesbian
- pulled a muscle in my back building a doghouse
- lost ten bucks in poker (not my money, who cares! HA!)
- finished up shuffle! and suzuka (both endings blew, what a surprise!)
so all in all. not an eventful week, but a meaningful one.
hi charon. ;)
edit:
so maybe i should clear up some things in my last post now that i have time to.
- the guy is a long-time friend of mine who i lost contact with for a few years because i felt i had to “change myself” - it’s complicated, really, really complicated. maybe someday i’ll write it out here, but not now. i recently caught back up with him and remembered all the reasons we were friends in the first place.
- the webcam striptease for a lesbian, well. that’s pretty self-explanatory. i’m friends with a lesbian, she wanted a striptease, i stripped. i’m pretty weak-minded. but she got a kick out of it. so yay!
- the doghouse. woo. my dad and stephanie were moving all their crap into the newly finished house, so on saturday night, and all of sunday, i moved things in, moved heavy stuff.. oof. and the majority of sunday, we built a doghouse - seven feet high, a foot off the ground, insulated underneath with hay, angled ceilings.. it’s a mansion, seriously. but i’m feeling the pain for it. this goddamn muscle won’t let the fuck go.
- well, the rest.. doesn’t need explaining, whoever’s reading this doesn’t care anyway.
the best of the pillows netted a big.. ten listeners at peak. granted, i did it at 12am, so that’s to be expected. and they’re japanese, only a few shackers seem to really like foreign music. no big whoop, i liked it.
BUT. tonight at 8pm, the best of dave grohl. two hours of the coolest guy in music today. rock the fuck out.
playing again tomorrow (sunday) at 4pm. listen in if you know what’s good for you. all.. two of you.
well, that was fun. on a whim, i decided to lock up an hour block of time for shackradio, shacknews’ user-run shoutcast server. i spent about 30 minutes stitching together one long mp3 to make it feel more like a “radio” and put static in between the songs.
most of the time it was inane drivel, such a wide spectrum.. the playlist was:
aside from a few skips in the humpty dance and the “currently playing:” not showing up (cos it was one long mp3), it was a pretty good success. everyone liked it. i’ll most likely do it again saturday night or sunday.
wanna listen?
who’s playing?